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Taurus Season 🐂: How to Embrace Your Inner Stubborn Cow Without Losing Your Damn Mind
Taurus season is here, demanding you slow down, ground yourself, and embrace your inner stubborn cow—preferably while eating snacks in a fleece robe. In this week’s diary of metaphysical mayhem, I try (and mostly fail) to align with the calm, earthy vibes of the season. If you’re feeling burnt out, overbooked, or tempted to hex your to-do list, this one’s for you.
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Burnt Offerings and Burnt Toast: A Beltane Prep Meltdown
Diary Entry – April 21, 2025 Let me start by saying this: Beltane is supposed to be sexy. Fire. Fertility. Passion. Earth’s renewal. Instead, I’m here standing in the kitchen wearing a vintage lace robe I found in a bin marked “lingerie and sadness,” a charcoal face mask that makes me look like a soot-covered raccoon, and holding a bundle of herbs I just yanked out of the toaster oven because I forgot them. Again. The smoke alarm goes off. Again. My grandson—Rowan, age eleven, neurospicy and deeply suspicious of anything that smells like patchouli—bursts into the kitchen holding the fire extinguisher he’s labeled “MOM 2.0.” “Is it another potion…
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Welcome to the Eclipse Dumpster Fire: How to Survive the Chaos Without Hexing Yourself
If you’ve been emotionally unhinged, rage-cleaning your spice drawer, or crying over a sandwich this week—congrats, you’re right on schedule. Eclipse season is here, and it’s less of a vibe and more of a full-blown cosmic eviction notice. Plans? Irrelevant. Feelings? Unfiltered. This blog post is your guide to surviving the celestial chaos with your dignity (mostly) intact, your crystals only mildly scorched, and your ex not magically cursed. Probably.
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Surviving (Yet Another) Mercury Retrograde Without Losing Your Mind
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Astrology for Skeptics: Can the Stars Really Mess with Your Life?
Astrology has been around for thousands of years, guiding everything from royal decisions to weather predictions. Ancient Babylonians charted the stars, Egyptian pharaohs sought celestial wisdom, and Greek philosophers like Ptolemy turned astrology into a structured system. Even Renaissance scientists like Kepler dabbled in astrological calculations. Today, it thrives as a tool for self-reflection (or cosmic scapegoating, depending on your perspective). But does it really influence our lives, or are we just reading too much into celestial coincidences? Let’s take a skeptical but entertaining look at whether the stars are pulling the strings—or if we just like blaming Mercury for our problems.
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Spring Equinox Tarot Spread: What Fresh Hell Awaits?
A Themed Spread to Navigate the Seasonal Shift with Humour & Insight Welcome to the Equinox – Balance? Never Heard of It. The Spring Equinox is here, that magical time of year when the day and night are technically equal, nature is in full bloom, and we’re all supposed to feel refreshed, renewed ,and perfectly balanced. Except… let’s be real. We’re shaking off the remnants of winter sloth mode, allergies are attacking, and Aries season is kicking in like an espresso shot to the soul. Change is coming – whether we’re ready or not. So, what fresh hell awaits? That’s where this tarot spread comes in. Think of it as…
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Surviving (Yet Another) Mercury Retrograde Without Losing Your Mind
Mercury is in retrograde again—so naturally, your phone is glitching, your emails have vanished into the void, and your ex just popped up...
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Magic Without the Aesthetic: Embrace Imperfection
If you remember dial-up internet, chances are your magic looks a little different from what TikTok witches are doing. You’ve seen trends come and go, watched metaphysical bookstores swap their incense-scented shelves for curated Instagram aesthetics, and somehow, you’ve managed to keep your practice alive despite the algorithm’s best attempts to convince you that you need an entire apothecary’s worth of herbs to cast a simple spell. Welcome to spirituality for the pre-smartphone generation – the ones who had to learn magic the old-fashioned way: through trial, error, and a few singed eyebrows. Back When Magic Wasn’t Googleable When I first developed an interest in the occult, there was no…
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Welcome to Unstable Magix: Midlife Magic, Mishaps & Manifesting (Eventually)
If you’ve ever tried to manifest abundance and ended up with unexpected bills instead – welcome home. Hi, I’m Everlie Blackthorn, and this is Unstable Magix – a blog for midlife mystics who are equal parts spiritual and skeptical, magical and messy. If you’ve ever tripped over your own altar, accidentally summoned a migraine instead of money or wondered why the universe keeps testing you when you clearly didn’t study – then you’re in the right place. What is Unstable Magix? It’s exactly what it sounds like: a mix of magic, mishaps, and mainfesting (eventually). This is not the place for fluffy, love-and-light, high-vibes-only spirituality. Here, we embrace the fact…
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Midlife magic, misfires, and manifesting… eventually
